Tag Archive for social network

Facebook and other online data can be legally stored for 7 years: think before you click.

July 2, 2011 3 comments

‘Think before you click’ is a standard mantra for teens using social networking. There is even more reason for this now since the US Federal Trade Commission has said that a private company, ‘Social Intelligence Corp’, can legally archive online data for 7 years.

Social Intelligence Corporation have been approved to gather and distribute personal info and images of job applicants that have been trawled from online sources including social networks. Job applicants must acknowledge and approve of a social network search, just like they need to approve criminal and credit history checks. However if you refuse permission will you really get the job?

We know that companies, universities and other organizations sometimes search the web of applicants’ details before offering a place, but this crystalizes the idea for our kids. Imagine what your 15 year old will be doing when they are 22… will they really want someone to search their back-catalogue of posts, images and tweets to find any potential skeletons? The after-party that went a little too far, the trick they played on another student, the cyber-bullying incident, the unfortunate image that their friend posted and tagged?

Seven years is a long time on the Internet, making it increasingly difficult to leave behind a the kind of teenage mistakes that an older generation can simply forget about. However, if a search returns negative information this must be reported to the applicant; the data can then be amended for accuracy.

However, it becomes ever more important to work with your children to protect their online reputation. The standard rules of ‘think before you click’, be paranoid about your security settings, and consider every shred of personal data before allowing it out on the web are even more important. Keep talking with your kids – discover what they know and think about managing their reputation online; they can regularly surprise with both their wisdom and their naivety. Encourage them to keep everything private, to consider whether a form they are completing really needs their compliance, whether the app they are downloading really needs their geo-location data; encourage them to be militant about their personal information: it is theirs and the have a right to privacy.

What your children post today will affect their options later on. Protecting their privacy goes a long way towards protecting their future academic and working life.

Child Internet Safety, Managing Online Reputation , , , , , , , , ,

Grooming – how can I recognise if my child is being groomed?

June 30, 2011 2 comments

What is Online Grooming?

“A course of conduct enacted by a suspected paedophile, which would give a reasonable person cause for concern that any meeting with a child arising from the conduct would be for unlawful purposes.” From the Sexual Offences Act 2003

Frequently child sex abusers groom their victims in recognised stages. As parents and carers we can learn what signs to look out for in protecting our kids.

In order to recognise a threat to our children we must get beyond the idea that child sex abusers are middle-aged male strangers in trenchcoats.  The reality is very different. A child is more likely to be abused by someone they know and a predator may be male or female and of any age.

Perpetrators go to great lengths to cultivate a relationship with a child to ensure their cooperation.  This cultivation is “grooming” and INTERPOL state that “The majority of sex offenders groom their victims.”

Identifying a Target

Whist predators have different preferences in terms of age, gender and other features, generally search for a child who appears vulnerable in some way.

Be aware of an adult who spends time in places like your local park playground or schools, particularly if they are not with a particular child. Be watchful and do feel able to question anyone to appears to take too close an interest in your child.

Information Gathering

Having identified a possible victim a paedophile will frequently attempt to gather information about the child, possibly through conversation with the child, but sometimes with the parents too.  Online chat rooms, games and virtual worlds allow relatively easy access. A predator will often try to cultivate a relationship whilst distancing a child from it’s parent by being sympathetic or overly complimentary toward the child, whilst reinforcing negative thoughts about their parent.  Some will offer opportunities, eg modelling photo-shoots or soccer trials. Others will quickly identify an insecurity or vulnerability and prey on it eg showering an unconfident child with undue affection and praise.

Be wary if an adult starts asking you or your child intrusive and personal questions. Teach your child that they don’t need to respond with personal data, just because an adult asks; if it feels wrong, it often is. Know which adults take an authoritative part in your child’s life; listen to your child if they talk of a particular adult more than another.

Lowering Inhibitions

With a relationship established a predator will try to introduce sexual context into the relationship, perhaps through increasingly sexual comments or showing film or images. This can initially cause embarrassment and discomfort and again it’s useful to teach children to recognise their discomfort as a warning signal.

Look out for changes in your child’s approach towards an adult in their life, and for inappropriate sexual interest or comments that they clearly must have heard elsewhere.  In terms of online relationships, keep the dialogue going about their interests online, who they meet and talk with.

Some children fear they will be in trouble or will disappoint their parents if they admit to having behaved inappropriately online and this works in an abuser’s favour – try to ensure your kids know that they can tell you without fear of trouble if they have made a mistake and need help. Predators will use this fear and guilt to blackmail a child into doing things they would never normally do.

Initiating the Abuse

Children who are being abused frequently show significant changes in their behavior and character. To protect your child, be informed about the issues, trust your knowledge and intuition and keep the dialogue open with your child. Be aware that the changes in behaviour mentioned may be as a result of other difficulties, eg bullying, but still warrant exploration.

Teach your child to listen to their intuition and act as soon as their alarm bells ring. If online, remind them not to go into private chat rooms with people they don’t know and trust in real life. Ensure they know how to protect their personal information online, eg privacy settings, not publishing personal data, avoiding public chat that gives away their ASL (age, sex and location). If they are approached while gaming or in a virtual world, where possible they should report an inappropriate approach to moderators, and protect themselves by logging out, leaving the world, and certainly not responding.

If you are concerned about an adult your child interacts with, investigate further and, if necessary, act to sever any questionable relationships.

Child Internet Safety, Grooming, Internet security , , , , , , ,

School Heads take collective action on cyber-bullying

June 28, 2011 No comments

FIVE head teachers of schools in Sydney have emailed all school parents emphasizing their cyberbullying policies after the local press revealed a website used by 2000 or more students hosted sexual slander.

Typically these school policies stipulate that students will not engage in cyberbullying, the consequences of which can be devastating for the targets. Two of the victims in this case were pupils in one of the five Northern Beaches Secondary College schools.  The head teachers acted to raise awareness of consequences amongst students and their families, giving advice that serious offences will be referred to the head teacher who will take action including “possible notification to the police and\or other appropriate authorities”.

A local spokeswoman referred to measures taken both against the offenders, and in support of the victims, but acknowledged that the schools have limited powers and cannot control Facebook. This is surely an issue for all schools and reinforces the idea of a need for greater parental involvement with children’s social networking, together with a consistent message to kids both in and out of school.

Bullying has always happened but cyberbullying is particularly disturbing in that it allows a degree of anonymity previously unknown, and people are accessible 24 hours a day through the digital cloud making them particularly vulnerable to a bully’s jibes.

In discussing this with our kids it can be helpful to use current news stories to open up the discussion, to encourage empathy and to highlight the consequences for those who overstep boundaries.

Some schools are finding it helpful to get students to develop their own peer support materials, to operate buddy systems, and to promote a communicative environment where nobody covers up for a bully and a trusted adult is made aware if one student is concerned for the wellbeing of another.

When talking with your kids, make sure they have a trusted adult they feel they can speak to… and don’t be offended if it isn’t you.  Some children will avoid speaking with a parent to protect their feelings or because they believe their parent cannot help – but it’s essential they can speak to somebody.

As ever, keep the communication lines open, talking and listening.  It’s important that our kids can take ownership of their part of the internet, creating and shaping the environment in a positive, vibrant and caring way – it’s like the Wild West out there at times and needs a little taming.

Child Internet Safety, Managing Online Reputation , , , , , , , , , ,